Sunday, March 20, 2011

Numinous tremendeum



"Knowledge is frightening, but if a warrior accepts the frightening nature of knowledge he cancels out its awesomeness. Knowledge is a most peculiar affair, especially for a warrior. Knowledge for a warrior is something that comes at once, engulfs him, and passes on." --from "Tales of Power," by Carlos Castaneda

Sometimes a good scare is just the thing. It's cleansing, everything shakes out. Sometimes it's OK to feel the wind that accompanies the opening of the gate of life and death. It's a heads-up, carpe diem reminder of the truth of mortality. At least that's what I'm thinking in the aftermath of the near-miss on Friday. I feel very clear as I integrate the experience. Instead of the usual pattern in which I would be working with the experience as if it were a dream (i.e. what does it mean that one car was black, the other white, etc.) I'm just letting the experience be.

I am somehow capable, don't know why, of perceiving the near-miss as knowledge that came at once, engulfed me, then passed through. Right now, somehow I am able to sit with it instead of trying to transform it into something that means something. It's kind of miraculous.

It was a big deal. Wow. Happy Sunday to all. Shalom.

9 comments:

Cyndy said...

I so glad you're okay. Even instantaneous scares can really rattle a person for a while.

tut-tut said...

We all need a safe place, don't we?

Meri said...

This and your previous post resonate fully with me, as a few days ago I almost became a hood ornament for a woman in a white Jaguar who thought reading her email as she approached a stop sign and pedestrian was more important than being oriented in time and place.

steven said...

hey reya - i read this and then i back-pedalled to get the scoop on your world and this almost revibration of you . . . . on saturday evening around eleven p.m. i flew over washington high enough to catch the last edge of the sunset and i visualized you somewhere in the spangled knots and webs of light and in my visualization put flowers and fairies - very kate greenaway i guess - around your head. spinning away is what i thought. little did i know. oh, yes i did!!! be safe. steven

Reya Mellicker said...

Steven!! You flew over Washington DC? It makes me happy to imagine you that close.

Rattled is a good word, Cyndy, though this time I haven't felt rattled - just the opposite. It's weird, eh?

Tut - when I had a anaphylactic episode last year, I stumbled off the Metro, over to this fire station. My voice was so hoarse as I said, "CALL 911." The fire people said, "We ARE 911." They took care of me, oh yeah.

Benadryl is something that should be a part of everyone's first aid kit.

Reya Mellicker said...

You flew over DC, STeven, and sent me exactly what I needed. Wow!!

willow said...

Gosh, SO glad to hear you're okay.

(Your email bounced back to me, but I wanted to thank you so much for ordering my book, dear friend. Your support is invaluable to me. ~t ((xxoo))

The Pollinatrix said...

I love (and totally get) that this has become a miraculous integration for you. And I am taken with that quote, the concept of being engulfed with power that just flows through. Yes!

Barbara Martin said...

Reya, your purpose is important (and the magnificent photos you take, especially the blooming trees). Sometimes an incident like this helps one to wonder about the miracles that occur.