Monday, May 23, 2011

Internalized



There will be something, anguish or elation, that is peculiar to this day alone. I rise from sleep and say: Hail to the morning! Come down to me, my beautiful unknown.
~ Jessica Powers


Breath, body, essence, connection, compassion. I'm thinking quite seriously about these things; the basics, I mean.

Actually, "thinking" is the wrong word. If I were actually thinking, I could come up with a language to describe what is ongoing for me these last few days. I am witnessing breath, body, essence, connection, compassion. I'm dancing (very gently) in an effort to align myself with these things. It's more like swaying back and forth than dancing. Sometimes I find myself turning in very slow circles, listening. It's not really dance, more like a moving meditation. It's not really witnessing in the way I am accustomed. What the heck is going on? Do you know?

I'm watching breath as it comes and goes from my clients, also from people I pass on the street, the folks standing ahead of me in the queue at the coffee shop. I am connecting with the truths our bodies express so exquisitely, sensing an essence that is both singular and communal. All this observing and gentle swaying is leading me somewhere. Don't ask me where!

Strange dreams, strange ideas and emotions are moving through me like weather systems, sometimes stormy, sometimes calm. Maybe this current moment of witnessing will evolve sooner rather than later, at which time I'll find a way to write about it. In the meantime, I guess I'm going to be enigmatic. Hm.

9 comments:

Jo said...

Hmmm...maybe being especially sensitive to the vibrations of the earth, you are feeling something from within her?

I appreciate your willingness to allow it to unfold in its own time. Your wisdom is infinite.

Peace today to you, Reya.

Reya Mellicker said...

Thank you Jo.

I've tried to force these things into shape so many times. The truth is, you can NOT push the river. God, Know, I've tried.

Kerry said...

Reading this was like being included in a strange, dreamy movie with you.

You see everything around you with amazing perception, so much so that your observations are palpable.

I have a ridiculous urge to tell you to be careful; don't twist an ankle! Isn't that silly.

steven said...

let it flow . . . you're so gifted in being able to get yourself out of the way of it all . . . when you try to understand it you actually stop the process in order to contain it enough to examine it and then . . . well, you work from that point on rather than allowing the flow to pass around and through. let it flow. turn reya. steven

glnroz said...

hummmm,,,for sure,,,in-out-in-out,,,deep breaths,,, yep.

Reya Mellicker said...

Deep breaths, yes. A good day of hard work, a lovely evening with a dear friend. This is the best way to process what's ongoing.

I am so grateful for all of you, you can not imagine.

Pauline said...

witnessing is such a good word for what you seem to be experiencing. it suggests a willingness to watch without trying to direct. maybe your struggle for the right word is telling you how to act?

janis said...

I understand this so well.
hmm.
Also had to look up enigmatic. (new word for me that I like)
:)

Barbara Martin said...

Everything on this planet has an essence. Your posts make my heart sing, Reya. Glad to hear you're awakening.