Wednesday, May 20, 2009
What part of "I banish thee" DON'T they understand?
I'm tired this morning after a long night of scary dreams. You would think, after reading about Ho Chi Minh (a.k.a. Tran Luc, Tuyet Lan, Le Thanh Long, Dan Viet, Nguyen Lai, Nam Son, Thau Chin ... etc.) all day yesterday, that I would be haunted by his ghost.
Strangely, my nightmarish thrashings were centered around ex-romantic partners. It was one of those dream states that mimics reality, so it felt like I was awake, lying in bed. In the dream state, Jake wants to go into the kitchen. I follow him there only to find my ex-husband making himself a sandwich. When he sees that I'm there, he rushes out of the room, chewing. I go back to my room and slam the door shut. I'm in no mood to deal with my ex-husband. On the floor in a sleeping bag is another ex. She's cold and wants more blankets. But I don't have any extra blankets. What to do? No way she getting into my bed with me. No way.
It was an almost lucid dream. I think, in the dream, This is MY dream - I can make these people disappear. I squeeze my eyes shut and focus all my willpower on vanquishing the exes, but when I open my eyes, what I see first is another ex boyfriend looking mournful and depressed, sitting on my little green couch.
Needless to say when I actually awoke this morning, the blanket and sheets on my bed were completely untucked, as if I'd been wrestling all night long. My jaw is so tight; I'm sure I was clenching. Sheesh.
Though I don't know how to link Ho Chi Minh with all these exes, I'm thinking less reading today, more walking around, is probably a good thing. I'm off to see the Sufi acupuncturist, too. That always helps.
It's interesting - and a bit disturbing - to notice the potent impact that my study of Vietnam is having on my psyche. Yikes!