Sunday, January 22, 2012

Kaddish



It was many years ago that a client I'll call S. died from breast cancer. She was 32 years old. Yes it was tragic, though she had suffered from the disease for four years. By the time she passed, she was ready. She was a soldier as is her husband. They had no kids, so they didn't have to contend with that. They were practical people. It was sad and it was a relief.

Here on Capitol Hill we are rallying around a family dealing with the imminent passing of their 28 year old daughter from a cancer so aggressive and rare, no one from Sloan Kettering to NIH has had a clue how to treat it. They tried every concoction of toxic chemo, all of which made this young woman miserable. Nothing slowed the growth of the cancer. The lesions are everywhere, growing exponentially.

She was diagnosed in September 2011. She's at home at last this weekend, away from the hospital setting. Home hospice has been set up. Now the family waits. It's the worst part.

This family has a lot of support from neighbors and friends, also from their spiritual community. Still, and of course, the parents are a wreck. I'm sending them a steady stream of Reiki, holding them in my heart of hearts.

In a situation like this it's hard to know what to pray for. I think it's more about giving it up, turning it over, surrendering to a greater wisdom, than asking for a particular outcome. Actually it's probably always better to surrender to a greater wisdom when praying. Yeah.

Like everyone else in the community, I'm waiting, thinking about the family, feeling grateful for my good health and well being, appreciating in ways I'm not normally able, how precious and beautiful life is.

Thanks for allowing me to share this sad news. Shalom.

10 comments:

Whitney Lee said...

I will add my energy to yours. How sad. I think the most difficult barrier to overcome would be the helplessness. We are a nation of doers (most of us), of fixers. The inability to do so must make that place of surrender that much harder to reach.

ellen abbott said...

It's very hard, waiting for death. When you know that that is the only end, the sitting vigil. may the survivors have strength and peace of mind. dying is not hard for the dying but only for the living.

Cheryl Cato said...

Indeed energy is what is needed by the family. Energy to gather the strength to persevere. I am so sorry for what the young woman and the family is going through and know they are dearly appreciating your support. I wish strength to you as well to continue giving support. Life is precious.

Linda Sue said...

Oh CRUMBS! Sad news indeed- 28 , just barely out of the shoot- I am sending a release, confident that all is well and that she pass quickly , with love.

Reya Mellicker said...

Linda sue, thank you,

Elizabeth said...

Sending love and warm wishes.
This is so horribly sad.
Thank God the poor girl is at home at least.
hugs

nerima roberts said...

Just 28 years old? So so so tragic. And her parents must deal with this, too. I can begin to see the depth the of parents' pain...my mother almost fainted in church at my brother's funeral. He was just 32, his life snuffed out in murder. I've never seen my mother faint. It's just wrong for a parent to bury their child...

Reya Mellicker said...

Nerima I'm so sorry to hear that. Unimaginable.

Elizabeth, thanks!

Anonymous said...

Sending love and light, along with moments of healing laughter to all concerned -- the dying one, the family, the friends, and all who are feeling this impending loss.

May her passage be smooth and their grieving be gentle and thorough.

Steve Reed said...

Wow. How horrible and sad. Most of us don't often realize how lucky we are, just to survive in good health from day to day.