Thursday, July 12, 2012

When Good Dreams Go Bad*


For someone as creative as I can be, the repetitious nature of my dreams is puzzling and sometimes annoying. There are themes played out in my dreams year after year. Can it be true that my mind is unable to work through whatever these dreams symbolize, hence they are replayed again and again? Is my unconscious truly that stuck on these issues?

One dream theme revolves around looking for my car that I've parked in a multi level car park. I search and search, walking through every level of these grimy, fluorescent lighted, ugly, stinky, creepy places. What a waste of dreamtime, hey?

I used to have this dream so often that one of my great teachers made up a song/chant to describe my endless quest to find my car. It was sweet of her, don't you think? I became lucid in some of the dreams, thinking to myself, "Well, this is my dream. I can just make my car appear." I would try, but although I could manifest cars of the same color, I could never manifest my actual car which was, at the time, a white 1989 Honda Accord. Or I would be almost lucid, thinking, "This is just like those dreams in which I search for my car."

I tried "real" life techniques to vanquish the dream. One time a friend of mine parked my car in a vast shopping center parking lot while I was in one of the stores so I couldn't see where she parked it. She came into the store and handed me the keys. I walked out to the lot, found my car within two minutes! I walked right to it. In "real" life my intuition was spot on. I was exhilarated - I thought for sure I had fixed it. But no - I kept having the dream.

A few years ago I dreamed I was sitting on a hill with my sister Hannah who was bemoaning the fact that she had lost her car. I was saying, "Yeah. It happens to me all the time," when a man walked up and told both of us where to find our cars, pointing in the direction of a small parking lot at the bottom of the hill. I did indeed spot my car there. I turned to the man and asked his name. He said, "Oh. You're not supposed to notice." That's when I realized he was an angel there to help me out of my predicament.

But.

I kept having the dream!

Last night I dreamed of searching for a car I had rented in order to drive around Paris with my sister. It was an old junker, but still I knew I would be financially responsible if it could not be found.

I could get all worked up about it, except I also had a terrifying dream of a derecho storm approaching. The anonymous dream people and I were up high in an office building. Usually the anonymous dream people are nonchalant no matter what's happening, but in the dream even they were frightened. I woke up from the dream, a sure sign that it was a true nightmare. It took awhile for me to realize I was safe in my bed here at the chateau.

One benefit of the harrowing nightmare is that it reduced the temptation to rail against the lost car dream.

Sigh. I guess there is nothing new under the sun, or at least between my ears when I dream. The same themes play themselves out over and over again, kind of like a Broadway show that goes on for years. My dream life is like Cats, or the Fantasticks. Actually it's more like Les Miserables. Good lord.

It's good to be awake now. It surely is! Shalom.


12 comments:

Janelle said...

hmmmm annoying...cars get you places..maybe something in your unconscious sayin' let it go...you'll get there..next time, say to yourself, sod it. i don't care. let me out. let me walk! and see what happens...? love x j

jeanette from everton terrace said...

I often cannot find my car in real life but have never dreamed that, must be frustrating.
I dream of finding stray dogs. In fact, I dream of dogs almost all the time.
I got goosebumps from your mountain top dream.

Reya Mellicker said...

I hate being in cars. Funny hey to search for something I actively dislike!

Jeanette yes, it was a numinous moment when he said I wasn't supposed to notice. Incredible dream.

ellen abbott said...

I don't have nightmares, at least not for a very very very long time. I'll have disturbing dreams sometimes but I don't really classify them as nightmares. and I only had one repetitive dream and haven't had it (it was a nightmare) since someone suggested I turn around and look at what I was trying to escape from. not much help for you though. what a weird dream to have all the time. searching for your car. so what does the car represent that you keep looking for it?

Reya Mellicker said...

I have amassed many theories about what the car means, Ellen. It's not even interesting to think about it anymore.

My vehicle through life? OK ... I thought that before I went to massage school, but bodywork and healing is definitely my lifetime vehicle.

My body? (Old junker, for instance.) But - I'm actually great at being in my body.

And the fact remains that I detest driving and even riding in cars. So what the hell am I looking for?

Hannah (my sister) said something very smart a few years ago about turning the frustration into gratitude or something like that. To be honest, I was never sure what she meant. But it shifted the way the dream felt for awhile.

Janelle I definitely tried the "I prefer to walk" technique. No dice.

My unconscious is stuck in a car park rut, so silly. Oh well. It could be a lot worse!

SG said...

Dreams are strange things. When I was going through a particularly tough phase in my life, I had recurrent dreams of witnessing an air crash. Someone who knew what I was going through pointed out that the flights in the dark sky were my ambitions and the crashes signified failure to achieve them....
I never had that dream again.

Ramesh said...

I used to dream bout a 15 years back, is it possible that I leave my car in a place and walk off, and when I come back wherever it is, it should come to me. And today I have made my dreams come true, I am into Automatic multilevel car parkign, wherein you just leave your car in the ground floor near to a entrance and walk off,and the car is parked anywhere below the ground or above the ground sometimes maybe upto 25 levels too. When I want it I just swipe a smart card and my car is there within 90 secs!!!!!!!!!So no more searchign of cars.

Reya Mellicker said...

Thanks, SG. I await the day when the dreams cease, but I'm not holding my breath!

Pam said...

Oh Reya. That sounds easier to manage than mine - an out of control lift ( you call them elevators?) in a huge skyscraper - locked in all by myself -up, down, and mercifully not sideways!!
Good that you have your two feet on the ground at least!
Wishing you sweet dreams for here on in.

Reya Mellicker said...

I've had that dream too!

Steve Reed said...

Reya, you don't even have a car now, do you? How funny. I almost never remember my dreams. They vanish as soon as I wake up. I could be dreaming the same thing every night for all I know.

Reya Mellicker said...

Best not to remember then, Steve!