All my prayers of request in recent weeks have centered around my longing to dissolve connections with anything that reinforces my bad habits. By clearing these connections I hope to move onwards and upwards towards happiness (whatever that means) and also towards a more peaceful and interesting life. The work with soul retrieval has convinced me that bad habits weaken the connection to soulfulness. Heading into old age, I want a profound connection to soul. Sure enough, all kinds of connections have dissolved, almost all of them spontaneously without any effort on my part.
The Sufi acupuncturist has been messing with my energy in a purposeful way, too, to dissolve bad habits around eating and drinking. He says that in order to change on a constitutional level, some people need to work on the breath. Others need to change the way they think. But the physiognomy of my face indicates that I have to change the way I eat.
Obsolete, at this point, is my habit of eating Clif bars for breakfast. As the acupuncturist points out, Clif bars are not food. My ex used to call them "virtual food." These days, even a bite of a Clif bar makes me so queasy. It's shocking since I've depended on Clif bars for many years. The story I told myself was that they "worked" as breakfast food. Now I'm not sure they ever did, but one thing I know for certain is that they don't work anymore.
I'm more susceptible than ever to the impact of alcoholic beverages. In fact last night I tried to drink a manhattan, one of my favorite cocktails. It tasted like poison to me. Coffee, too, tastes bad - even Peets, my very favorite. And most shocking of all, I haven't eaten dark chocolate in more than a week.
Wow.
Be careful what you pray for. This period of time, this healing crisis, is harrowing on many levels. Yikes!
11 comments:
The good things about a healing crisis are that (1) you're healing and (2) the unpleasant side effects are limited in duration. The underlying healing, however, is of a much more enduring nature. Hang in there -- it is all for the greater good.
ahhhhhh regarding you 'food and drink' concerns I'm reminded of this:
"There is nothing either good or bad - but thinking makes it so."
hamlet act II - scene II
good luck with how and what you think....and the best of health to you....
congratulation on all you have achieved so far with this - hang in and see where it takes you. It is always tougher to beat a new path than follow the well worn one but the outlook will be fresh and energising i am sure - love your blog! thanks for sharing your thoughts with us
Clif bars are for long LONG hikes and camping, that was what they were designed for. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day my mother used to say, and she'd be up at the crack of dawn cooking for us all. It does set the tone.
my favorite t-shirt says, "Change is Good, You Go First!"
I'm sure so much of what is written here is for me too
and
I'll wait to see how it works for you
first : - )
Much love and blessings to you.
Habits are very hard to change. "A pleasure ceases to be a pleasure when it becomes a habit." A fortune cookie slip I have . .
So...what are you eating?
I have found that since delving into my spiritual path, my tolerance for alcohol has gone waayyy down. Like you said, it is like putting poison in my body.
Love,
Salima
Hello beautiful Shannon!
I haven't figured out what to eat just yet, so I'm experimenting. I've had scrambled eggs and fruit - nice breakfast, though more labor intensive than I'm used to. Yoghurt and granola is OK. Scones not so much. The acupuncturist wanted me to cook rice gruel all night in the crockpot. The results are truly horrible - it was like eating glue. Warm glue. Yuck!
I'll keep experimenting. I'm thinking dinner leftovers might work well for me. We'll see.
My rule of thumb on eating is to eat what appeals to me. So far, that serves me pretty well! I've never had much of a sweet tooth and never liked meat, so those are easy to skip. I do like my wine with dinner from time to time, but heck, even the docs say that can be healthy! :)
I usually have oatmeal, cream of rice or wheat, eggs or Greek yogurt with blueberries or some other berry. One of those.
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