Thursday, April 24, 2008

In the Chute

Right at the very end of the end of all things (relationships, living situations, etc. though in this case I'm talking about a work space), what I want to do is zip ahead in time, skip the final dregs of emotion, the packing up, the final argument, the last bits of cleaning up. Dragging through the last few days of anything is very difficult.

And so it goes as I count down the days until I'm out of Healing Arts. My dream life is crazy with dreams of needing to do a massage but not having a space, or I go to the space and there are all the anonymous dream people sitting around, eating cheetos and making a mess. I'm screaming at them GET OUT but they're completely unmoved by my vehemence. Or I can't find the massage table or the boombox or my massage cream.

I wake up from these nightmares exhausted.

The departure itself, from any kind of situation, is very exciting to me, even if I'm particularly attached to whatever I'm leaving. My mantra this week is my favorite line from the film Titanic. It's delivered by a steerage passenger to her young child.

"It'll all be over soon."

Oh yeah!


Barbara said...

I think your dreams are telling you that you need proper closure to this era of your life so that you can gracefully move on to the next one.

The image of bowling pins is an interesting one, especially juxtaposed with the most gorgeous dogwood photo I have ever seen.

mouse (aka kimy) said...

we are catching up here on the north coast....I saw dogwoods in bloom yesterday!! yeah!!!

yes, it'll all be over soon. and soon your psyche will adjust to it's new work 'reality' and your dreams will be sweet....

until then the sweetest and pinkest thoughts up in the cosmos for you in these last 'lame duck' days at h.a.

deborah said...

Spring Forward
and the homage to Papa
gone for 30 years now
so lovely and perfect in their
singular opposition

Spring Forward
on a soft spring, Reya
Breathe deeply and sweetly
Get lots of sleep and sweet nectars
pear, apricot--

Nap and walk slowly

The circles of your life intersect so smoothly Reya--ending one day, beginning the next and then time
with writers and thinkers and

baths are nice too
for ratcheting down the energy
bringing it back up slowly and
deliberately and then sharing and having it shared with you

Love you so much.

Reya Mellicker said...

Thanks ya'll for the encouraging words. Really!

Great advice from my older/younger sister Deborah, too.

Bowling pins on a poster for mattresses ... what is THAT all about?

Lynne said...

Well, maybe you're supposed to "bowled over" by what a great sleep you get on a BeautyRest mattress. ?bizarre.

Dogwoods are my favorites! When we first moved here I didn't know what they were. I was entranced at first sight. Too bad they don't last very long. This one looks great against the color of the building behind it! Lovely photo.

Washington Cube said...

My pink dogwood is dead, finally giving up the ghost after many years. Now I need to find someone with a chain saw.

Lee's River/Zlatovyek said...

good luck with the moving on, Reya. there's always a messy transition place and the urge to just get on with it, isn't there?
gorgeous dogwood. very japanese looking.

d. chedwick bryant said...

Unbelieveable PIX!

Steve said...

Yikes. That Titanic line gives me chills.

Just take the end of things as you would anything else, minute by minute. That's my advice. :) I think it's the wishing that things were over that stresses us out, rather than what's really happening to us every moment. (Easy for me to say, right?)

Love the dogwood photo. So beautiful.

Reya Mellicker said...

Maybe it's easy for you to say, STeve, but it's so helpful for me to hear this.

Thank you!