Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Old Friends



Tomorrow after work I'll head over to the Dubliner where I'll meet up with my friends John and Paula. Friends? They are so much more than friends, they are family. You know what I'm talking about? We met when I was living at Lake Tahoe at the very beginning of the 1980s. We "recognized" each other immediately as family-friends-clan-tribe, and we've been close friends ever since.

They live in San Francisco, which means we don't get a lot of actual time together. True, too, is that we let months slip by sometimes inbetween phone calls or even emails. It doesn't matter. Getting into a groove with one another is seamless, effortless. We don't have to try or work to stay close, or to catch up.

Not saying I never get on their nerves. Everyone who is willing to be a close friend has to put up with my tendency towards officiousness. They don't really care much. When I get obnoxious, without putting any extra spin on it, they simply tell me to knock it off. It is such a loving willingness they have to accept me exactly as I am. It's luxurious, and very rare.

They are whip smart and funny as hell. Paula has explained things to me that I could never have found language to describe. For instance, I always knew I disliked digital clocks, but had no idea why until she explained that time is not a number, it's cyclic, hence the analog clock on which the hands spin round and round (clockwise, don't you know), is a much clearer way to deal with time. Oh yeah. Brilliant, hey? John clearly predicted my association with Reclaiming long before I began my training in the craft. He "saw" it. Wow.

We will no doubt spend time at the Matchbox bar. We're going to go to the Hirschhorn to see Andy Warhol's abstract paintings. We'll walk around and take pictures (they share my love of photography). I will show them Eastern Market and the chateau, of course.

I'm not saying here that there's anything wrong with friendships/relationships that require a lot of work to maintain. That kind of connection can be very satisfying, and I have friends for whom I feel a deep love even though being friends is so strenuous. But with John and Paula, it's smooth. It has been smooth for thirty years. Oh man, I can't wait to see them.

To the miraculous nature of friendship! Cheers!!

9 comments:

Merle Sneed said...

Deep friendships are one of life's greatest gifts. Enjoy!

Reya Mellicker said...

Merle it's so good to "see" you, old friend!

steven said...

my oldest friends are my children. next up would be a small group of people who entered my world around fifteen years ago, then a group who entered my world about three years ago.
i wonder a lot about friends i had before those times. i can picture them and the moments we shared and created so clearly. it would be cool and frightening to have everyone in the same place - at once - and not explain why. steven

Reya Mellicker said...

Steven, if you join FB, you will re-unite with old friends, I guarantee it. You will gather all together in one place, all at once, but it isn't scary there because you can always close the computer and go for a bike ride.

Kerry said...

This sounds good. I hope you have a wonderful, refreshing time together.

Andy Warhol's abstract art? How fun!

Steve Reed said...

You just can't replace a connection with old friends, who have seen you through so much evolution and change. Enjoy!

Pam said...

Before I saw the heads in the shadows in your last photo, as I scrolled down it looked like two hearts together, so fitting for love and affection side-by-side over the years.

ellen abbott said...

yes, some good time ahead.

Cheryl Cato said...

Cheers indeed! That kind of friendship is difficult to come by and is one to be totally cherished.