Thursday, September 3, 2009

Literally


The angle of the sun is perfect at this moment in early fall. All the tiny late summer flowers stretch up towards the fading days.

You know that phrase, cross stitched on a million pillows, or framed and hung in the kitchen, made famous forever when Dorothy clicked her heels together three times, right? There's no place like home. Of course you know it. That phrase is literally true for me.

I've lived in all four time zones of the continental United States, in cities, suburbs and rural areas (I think Lake Tahoe is rural, yes?) None of these locations (at least yet) has felt 100% like home, not ever.

I've done a decent job making myself comfortable everywhere I've lived - except Portland, Oregon, that is. I never felt at ease the whole time I lived there though admittedly I hadn't had a lot of practice and at the time I was one holy mess of unresolved issues. Can't blame Portland for the miseries, train wreck and nervous breakdown I suffered when I lived there. No wonder I began to call Portland "My City of Spiritual Lacerations" as soon as I moved away. Other than the non-stop rain, it wasn't Portland's fault.

Yesterday I made a lengthy list of qualities that would create the perfect home for me, ranging from specifics such as lettuce as good as can be had in San Francisco, air as sweet as in Lake Tahoe, and four defined and dramatic seasons like in DC, as well as more general attributes like "stars" and "proximity to a big body of water - river, lake or ocean." After I finished the list I tallied up the results. San Francisco, DC, Lake Tahoe and "Other city" scored exactly the same number of desirable qualities.

Had to laugh. I'm at home everywhere and nowhere. That's OK, isn't it? I say it is. So be it.


Driving tour of the Golden Gate Bridge.

21 comments:

Al In The County said...

Great picture, as always.

Have you heard of a site called www.findyourspot.com? I'd be interested where it suggests you settle down.

I also have lived everywhere. I literally have lived in the 4 corners of the continental US (Seattle, San Diego, Miami, and now Northern Maine) along with San Francisco and DC. It wasn't until I met my partner that I felt "at home", so I wonder if its not the location that matters.

Reya Mellicker said...

I'm going to go check it out. Thanks, Al!

Reya Mellicker said...

That was fun! (findyourspot.com) All my top spots are in New England except for Morgantown and Berkeley Springs in W.V.

Hmmmmm.....

willow said...

My roots are down in the midwest. Mine, as well as my ancestral roots. I do, however, at times long to be near water and for cooler air. But home is certainly where the heart is.

Janelle said...

your pics are SO filled with beautiful sparkly light. lovely lovely and LOVELY that you're BACK finally! missed you! lots lots love xxx j

Nancy said...

You are at home with yourself. How wonderful is that?

I have to admit, I have moved over the last five years and lived in different places, but home for me is Tahoe. I feel a connection to all that is around me when I'm here. I grew up 21 miles from here, so my memories are connected to this place. I would live in Portland. That's where my children are living, and I miss being near them, but I never really felt a part of the city when we lived there. I think it gets harder as we get older to connect to a place. The perfect "place" resides within.

Expat From Hell said...

Honestly? I think you sound like a Europe person. Southern, probably. I lived in Lisbon for a while. Delightful. Good for the soul, the body, and the heart. But the other folks are right: the right place starts on the inside.

EFH

Jeninacide said...

I used to think I felt at home in Portland... now I want to leave. I think I will go to Europe like ExPat suggested... even if only in my mind. :o)

Reya Mellicker said...

Expat you are correct! I feel completely at home in many locations in Europe. Wow. I forgot all about how happy my feet are to connect with that continent.

Expat From Hell said...

My ID photo was taken on Mykonos. See me carrying the beers? See how happy I am?

EUROPE!

Reya Mellicker said...

Expat - Let's GO!!

John Hayes said...

As far as a place that really spoke to me, I can't say any place compares with San Francisco. I do wonder hopefully about the oregon coast. I know a lot of folks feel strongly the other way, but I'm not a big fan of the four distinct seasons reality--maybe I got enough of that in my Vermont upbringing!

Pam said...

Some people make us feel at home - some places do. Just wonderful when that feeling happens,it's not even a sparky recognition is it, more of a sigh, and the soul relaxes.It was Wales for me, on the other side of the world.For my daughter, Africa.

Ronda Laveen said...

When you are comfortable where ever you are, you are comfortable in your skin, with yourself. I think you would be comfortable in the Milky Way or on Jupiter too.

Loved the picture of the fog in the trees at the university campus from yesterday's post. And your new banner? Stunning!

lakeviewer said...

Loved this picture and the video of the Golden Gate Bridge. You are still the wanderer, still searching. On day, you will know.

steven said...

hi reya, i took the trip over to that linked site and it seems like i should be living in arkansas, oregon, or california. a couple of times maryland came up!
i figure home's where your heart is . . . i take my heart with me wherever i am . . . have a lovely evening. steven

Reya Mellicker said...

The linked site didn't work for me either. New England has long winters, not much spring or fall, and it's overcast all the time.

Expat From Hell said...

The only thing good about New England is the clam chowder. Google "Salema".
Enough said, my friend.

EFH

Merle Sneed said...

Among the many things that I admire about you, your openness to fully experiencing life stands out..

Lizzy Frizzfrock said...

Beautiful flowers just stretching toward the sun. Lovely photo.

I don't know where the "best" place for me would be. I love Texas, but the summer heat is oppressive and the 2 year drought is disturbing.

A favorite quote of mine & one that I think of often is from Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry and one I fall back on when I think living somewhere else would be better.
Lorena is pining to go to San Francisco and Gus tells her,

"Life in San Francisco is still just life. If you want one thing too much it's likely to be a disappointment. The healthy way is to learn to like the everyday things, like soft beds and buttermilk--and feisty gentlemen."

Barbara Martin said...

When I lived in London, England for two years I felt like I had come home. But, I still have that yearning to return to the Canadian prairies, too.