Friday, February 27, 2009
Peculiarities of Relationship
One of my favorite things about restaurants and cafes is that they offer so many chances to people watch. Sometimes I am quite clinical in my observations, noticing the clenched levator scapula muscles, the pulsing masseters, the jittery feet of people who are stressed out and really need a massage. Watching people sit down, and even more interesting, stand up, shows me many things about the functionality of their quadriceps.
Lately what I've been watching in cafes are the energetic relationships between people who meet for coffee or lunch. When they first see each other there is inevitably an awkward moment unless they're already the very best of friends. Will they shake hands, have a hug or just say hello? If one of them is already seated, will he/she stand up? There's always a moment of adjustment, a sense that two worlds have just collided.
Once they're seated, their voices modulate themselves, adjust in tone and decibel level to the other. Within the first couple of minutes, their bodies begin to mirror each other. After a few minutes, often - not always - both people will be sitting, for instance, with chin in hand, legs crossed. When one person uncrosses his/her legs, the other person does, too. I'm sure it isn't conscious.
Again when it's time to go, there's a moment of awkwardness because the two people, through the mirroring and voice modulation, have woven their energetic fields together. Even if they're meeting for business there's a second when it feels like something is being torn apart, as they separate.
The Tribute to Lost Loves I wrote about in the Peacock post, as it turns out, is not an altar but a painting. As with all such endeavors, I am learning so much about myself as I go through the process. Unlike Whistler's Peacock Room, this painting is rather pretty. Who knew?
When it's time for me to bury this painting, I wonder if I'll have an awkward moment like the people in cafes when it's time to leave? Or will I be all the way done with it and happy to shovel earth on top of it? We shall see.
Two seconds after I took this pic, the person on the left put her hands on the table and started fiddling with a piece of paper, just like the guy. Really!