I have been out of synch, oh man, have I ever. It started when my old camera broke, I think. Or maybe I could trace this short period of chaos to re-entry after the trip to the lake, when I couldn't "see" anything. Once my photographic eye was disrupted, like a line of carefully placed dominoes, all kinds of other things went haywire. The chaos erupted from out of the nowhere in many arenas of life - physical, mental/emotional, spiritual. It has been rather crazy.
In the Reyaverse what that means is that somehow I've gotten caught up in a wild eddy of energy. We live in an ocean of energy. It's easy to get off track, out of synch. It is so easy! Suddenly you find yourself twirling in a vortex of crazy energy. And the shit goes down all around for awhile. Do you know what I'm talking about?
Just as with canoeing, when I figure out I'm swirling out of control, I must skillfully navigate my way to gentler waters. Sometimes I'm skillful, sometimes not so much. One good thing is that I've had a lot of practice.
Getting back to center always involves some thrashing. I have thrashed this past week, oh my. I've had crazy dreams, been introduced to a new spirit animal guide, received many an insight. It hasn't all been bad. I hurt someone's feelings, not on purpose, but that was hard - and unexpected. My massage therapist forgot about the appointment we had, the first time that has happened in the two or three years I've been seeing her regularly, like clock-work, every other week. Massage is contraindicated in the midst of trying to right oneself. I guess! My devices went crazy. Suddenly even my computer refused to recognize my old passwords. I could go on but I'm sure you get the picture.
It took three tries to replace the camera that died. I'm extremely pleased with the Panasonic Lumix that I've ended up with. Learning the camera is quite a curve. Even though it's still a point and shoot, there are many more features than I've ever had. It's a beautiful being that deserves respect. I always threw my old cameras in my pocket, believing that the best camera is the one you always have with you. But after the old one died I realized I needed to step it up this time.
Suddenly today the energy changed. I felt I had somehow groped my way back to a nice, smooth current in the ocean of energy in which we live. I felt calmer, my stomach didn't hurt. I had energy for my clients. A Genius Bar appointment after work solved my gadget problems, and in fact I took it as a sign I was coming back into synch (such as I ever am) that my genius bar guy was someone I've worked with before. I could have been assigned to any of them, but somehow my number came up just as he began his shift.
Periods of chaos are a part of living life in this wondrous world. In the Reyaverse, avoiding chaos is not possible all the time. Weather moves through lives. It's nerve-wracking as it happens but at age 60, I've been there and done that. I can remember other periods of growth and change. I can remember that eventually things settle down.
No matter, it's good to feel more even, grounded and oriented again. It surely is.
Shalom.
8 comments:
I love this post. Yah, re-entry is a bitch. But the camera thing. I thing I just couldn't deal with it and on the advice of a guy with a 'real' camera who told me that any of the point and shoots were so advanced now that they would do what I wanted so I just got a newer version of what I had had. But it's all different! I'm still figuring It out. Now the macro is supposed to be automatic instead of setting it on macro. Good in some ways as the focus field is expanded, but sometimes it just doesn't want to focus on the right thing!
Anyway, life is very much like weather. When I was raising my kids and before I understood my own contribution to the discord in my life, my mantra was...it's only temporary. It got me through some very tough times.
It's only temporary is the truest truth ever!!
The cameras - all of them - are bewildering. I will hardly get to explore all the features on this one before it becomes extinct. But it's sleek and beautiful. It feels good in my hand and I'm enjoying the pics I'm taking with it. Also thinking there are many other kinds of pics I will be able to take that were not possible with the old Nikon - bless its heart. I took 50,000 pictures with it!
I'm glad you're back in the swing of things! It's weird how a lot of disconnected (apparently) events all seem to happen at once sometimes. When it rains it pours, as they say.
So when you say it took three tries to replace your camera, did you actually buy and return two earlier cameras?
I looked at the first one but did not buy it. Bought the Nikon, exchanged it for the Lumix. A process
Glad to know you have new eyes. Do you have plans for a burial or memorial for the old camera? Our relationships with tools are so curious, in some ways as complex and important as those with humans. Do certain tools have "attitude" that was embedded by their creators? Oh, and will there be a photo of the Lumix? Or is it camera shy?
Welcome back to yourself Reya. Isn't discombobulated a great word!
Just last night I was realizing (while I brushed my teeth) that I'm finally back in sync with my world. I loved my 6 days in NC - but yes, reentry was a bitch!
I'm so glad to be back in the flow of things I've canceled my root canal appointment. My tooth doesn't hurt & I just want to enjoy the ride for a bit before I have that done. Don't worry - I'll reschedule before the end of the year. :)
I'm not worried about you at all, Dana.
Junkthief - I took the battery out of the camera and disposed of it safely. Then I put it on an altar for a few days. Finally, tossed it in the trash. It served me well, I took 50,000 pictures on it!
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